The Little Egalitarian and Other Scary Stories

I'm back with a few frightening tales from the field.

The other day Elizabeth was helping me fix lunch. She tied on her little vintage apron and flitted around the kitchen like she knew what she was doing. “Good job, Suzy Homemaker!” I said. A few minutes later, Silas (whom the girls call Brother) was putting forks on the table, which we all know is such a domestic job. “Brother Homemaker,” he grunted to himself.

Here’s a treasure from Elizabeth. She said, “Hey, Mama, if you lose a whole bunch of weight, and get super, super skinny, then you will be Daddy’s trophy wife.” Uh-huh. Thanks, Nutrisystem.

Someone please tell me that my Sarah is not the first toddler in the world to pick up chewed gum from the floor of the ice cream shop, and recycle it for herself!!!!!!!!!